New Year, New What?

Nine days into the new year, and things just dont seem to get right. Worse if I may say.

Our family is getting bigger and our house is a bit crowded now. During this pandemic, our family is very careful and strict to keep our social and physical distancing. Until…

One of the helpers (N) at home went to her hometown. A week ago she came back to this house (Jan 2nd) and of course we asked her to do the health protocols: wearing mask at all times for 14 days and washing hands regularly. She was the nanny of my baby niece and I am worriedsick for the baby.

2 days upon her arrival (Jan 4th), the other helper (A) told us that N was sick. So that very morning we asked N to get the PCR Test. The very sameday, the result came out and she was tested positive. Since she had the symptoms, my sister gave N an option to self-quarantine at the hospital, but she refused it and wanted to go back to her hometown instead. Since it was also because of her own doing that she caught the virus, so we let her go.

The bad news is, now we need to concern about the baby and A (because she shared the room with N). Fortunately, both of the baby and A do not have any symptoms. But still, for precautions, Jan 7th, I took A to the hospital for the PCR Test. This evening, the result just came out, and yes as predicted, A is also positive. A is the one who cooks for us and does the general cleaning at home. Although she is also wearing a mask most of the times after we knew that N was infected, I have to say that I am scared now.

Oh my god. The virus is here. In our roof. I just cant sleep, because tomorrow morning, every person in the house (including all the babies) will be tested for covid. I pray to God that nobody will get the positive result… Please…

But what if we do?

Beautifully written by Dad for my birthday.

Nadia

Tambah usia
tambah dewasa
tambah bijak

Ada perjalanan cinta
karier dan kerja
Kau sudah berumah tangga
sudah pula
dikaruniai putra
Aidan putra pertama

Mimpi-mimpi
telah kau raih
sudah kau jelajahi
seperempat dunia
padahal dulu
kau anak manja
tak bisa jauh dari rumah

Hari ini
Milad mu
yang ketiga puluh satu
Pasti masih ada
cita-cita
yang belum wujud nyata
kau bulatkan tekad
pasti kelak
jadi realita

Aku selalu
medoakan mu
Hidup bahagia
Hidup punya makna
Hidup meraih pahala

Diusia mu kini
yang baru sepenggalah
masih banyak langkah
mendaki
meraih mimpi
torehkan prestasi

Selamat milad
putri bungsu

Doa papamu
Selalu

Mom’s Multiple Personality Disorder

Videocall sama Mama, begitu liat muka gue di layar, Mama langsung nangis.

M: Pulanglah nak, pulang, Mama sakit. Mama kangen *sambil nangis

I: Iya nanti pulang, kalau Nad udah selesai sekolahnya langsung pulang ya Ma. Sabar yaa… *ikutan mewek

I: Ma, Mama inget ga dulu suka beli kebab? Sekarang Inad udah bisa bikin sendiri, enak deh Ma!

M: Lo tuh disana sebenernya sekolah apa ngapain sih? Kok masak doang isinya?

I: Ma, kangen sama Aka ga Ma?

Cuma diem, terus geleng-geleng

M: Anak Mama cakep ya sekarang

I: Hah, siapa Ma?

M: Inad

I: Apaan orang Mama lagi merem gitu, emang liat?

M: Liatlah, pake mata batin Mama

I: Ma, ini kan hari Senin, nanti hari Rabu Inad mau nari. Doain lancar ya Ma?

M: Sekolah apa kesenian sih? Kok Inad ga pernah cerita kalau lagi belajar?

M: Jangan lupa kasih alamat, Mama mau kirim surat?

I: Hah? Buat apaan Mama kirim surat?

M: Iya, Mama mau cerita di surat. Kirim pakai merpati

Hmmm kalau udah bisa begini artinya si Mama udah mulai sembuh ya… Mau pulang pulang pulang, kangen emakkk 🙁

Posting this one, cause I really miss her so…

Rest well, Ma. I love you.

It took us almost 9 years, to finally find our way to each other. I feel so blessed and grateful of where we are right now and I know, a single post would not do it justice.

Well, happy five-month anniversary. Thank you for bearing with me. I know things will not get any easier, but we will always have each other to conquer it all.

Here is to the more weight we gain and more beautiful things to come (especially that little bundle of joy who is busy kicking his way out of this belly).

M: Aku boleh minta kamu janji sesuatu ga?

H: Apa?

M: Nanti, kalau kita punya anak, kamu janji ya, harus bisa didik anak kita yang bener. Biar nanti anaknya ga banyak mau, ga ngambek mulu tiap sebentar.

H: Kamu ga mau anak kita kaya gitu?

M: Enggalah…

H: Loh? Kok aneh sih?

M: Aneh gimana? Aku pengen anak kita jadi anak baik loh itu maksudnya…

H: Iyaaa, aku paham. Jadi berarti kamu ga mau anak kita jadi kaya kamu dong?

Lalu dia ngakak ga berhenti-berhenti karena seketika itu juga gue ngambek. Habis dia selesai ngetawain gue, terus dia bilang lagi…

H: Masukin dialog ini ke blog kamu dong… aku kangen deh udah lama ga baca tulisan kamu lagi.

So here it is. Thanks for reminding me to start writing again.

Habis nonton The Greatest Showman dan jatuh cinta sama semua soundtrack nya. Seperti biasa, si anak musik dan lirik ini pun langsung merasa relate sama salah satu lagu yang manis banget. Lalu gue kirim link Spotify ke si doi supaya doi dengerin.

Some people long for a life that is simple and planned
Tied with a ribbon
Some people won't sail the sea 'cause they're safer on land
To follow what's written
But I'd follow you to the great unknown
Off to a world we call our own

Sampai beberapa hari kemudian, waktu lagi dengerin radio di mobil, randomly terputarlah lagu dari salah satu band lokal yang gue bahkan ga pernah denger namanya.

“Dengerin, ini lagu buat kamu…”

Hanya kamu yang bisa
Membuat aku jadi tergila-gila
Membuat aku jatuh cinta
Karna tak ada yang lain sepertimu
Berkali ku mencoba
Berpaling dengan makhluk indah lainnya
Namun tak pernah ku rasakan
Bila seindah bercinta ku denganmu

Beb, why sih why selera musik kita segitu bedanya. This is such a deal breaker sih, but I love you too much buat ilfeel sekarang…

Another year has passed.

Tahun ini banyak banget hal terjadi yang ngasih pembelajaran tersendiri untuk setiap momennya. Alhamdulillah, at the age of (almost) 28, I finally got things figured out. Tahun ini belajar untuk ngurus diri sendiri dan less dependent sama orang lain, belajar masak, dan belajar let go of the people that once meant the most in my life. Tahun ini survived kuliah master dengan segala drama ups and downs nya dan resmi lulus dengan nilai yang cukup memuaskan. As a bonus, tahun ini juga dapet pekerjaan di institusi yang ada dalam list prioritas pekerjaan idaman, right away setelah lulus kuliah.

Tahun ini juga jadi tahun ter-mobile for the history of my entire existence in this world keknya. Berpindah lokasi dari satu kota ke kota lain, satu negara ke negara lain, dan moving in-moving out sampai 4x, in order to settle down. Life has always been in motions.

Dan di penghujung tahun ini juga, I found him.

Satu per satu, dengan kuasa-Nya, semua urusan duniawi gue terselesaikan pada waktunya.

Thank you 2017, you’ve been so amazing for me this whole year. Alhamdulillah. Now on to another chapter. Hopefully next year everything will be much much better. Amen!

Stay, stay, stay
I’ve been lovin’ you for quite some time, time, time
You think that it’s funny when I’m mad, mad, mad
But I think that it’s best if we both stay, stay, stay, stay
 
You took the time to memorize me
My fears, my hopes, and dreams
I just like hangin’ out with you, all the time
All those times that you didn’t leave
It’s been occurring to me I’d like to hang out with you, for my whole life
 
Stay, and I’ll be loving you for quite some time
No one else is going to love me, when I get mad, mad mad
So I think that it’s best if we both stay, stay, stay, stay, stay, stay
Taylor Swift – Stay

M: Maaf yaa aku manja, jangan sebel…

H: Nggak kok, aku sukaaa. Masih batas wajar juga…

Sampai beberapa hari kemudian di parkiran.

M: Pakein dooong (sambil nyengir ke si doi yang nyodorin helm di tangan nya)

H: Ckckck, udah kayak punya adek baru tau ga sih gue rasanya (sambil ngegerutu tapi cekikikan)

It’s too late to back off baby, sorry :p